Friends Tell You What You Won’t Tell Yourself

Have you ever noticed you’ll go to a friend to talk about a problem, it could be something like relationship troubles, job issues or financial dilemmas. You’ll dutifully describe the issue with all the details, give the pros and cons to the situation. You’ll go over all the possible scenarios relating to the issue.  Your friend meanwhile will just look at you like you are crazy. They’ll give you the look of, ‘Duh, the answer is obvious.’

That’s because the answer is obvious and you know it too, but you just aren’t allowing yourself to come to the answer on your own.

Why is that? Is the truth too painful? Probably.  Do we as humans try to justify poor behavior and poor decisions by having our friends to back us up? Probably.  You know you have a good friend when they set you straight. They tell you what you don’t want to hear. They tell you what you won’t even tell yourself.

I’ve been on both sides of this equation.  I’ve had friends come to me describing their relationship woes and trying to justify reasons for their partner’s poor behavior.  It’s weird listening to what is so irrational.  Today I found myself on the other side of that irrational line. It stunk being that person that can’t find the answer on my own. But I so appreciate my friend who told it to me straight and reminded me that I already knew the answer. Because I do, I just didn’t want to admit it.

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